Question: I feel confused, upset, and disappointed. I have been practising a changed method of Kriya for so long, and now many things I was taught by (a Kriya yoga association) have been thrown into doubt. Why was Kriya Yoga changed? And why are certain organisations so powerful? In short, how could God let such a thing happen to Kriya? (continued)
Answer: In the lifetimes of Lahiri Mahasaya, Tinkari Lahiri and my Guruji, Satya Charan Lahiri, there were disciples who wanted to become renunciants. But Lahiri Mahasaya said that Kriya practice itself makes a person sannyasin – you are sannyasin when you have no desires. Otherwise it is dressing up like an actor or a kind of showing-off so that people will notice you and say you are a very spiritual person. It is a kind of escape from society.
Lahiri Mahasaya never dressed like a sannyasin or told his disciples to take a path of renunciation. He told his disciples to live as they were – he said that through Kriya you can tune your mind. No one can recognise you, and yet there is some difference. A yogi is eating and walking and talking, but slowly through practice he becomes different.
That is why Lahiri Mahasaya showed his anger when people wanted to become a renunciant and would tell them never to come back to him. These people were no longer welcome at their Guru’s house because they created publicity and monastic orders having changed the practice. They created a different tradition, and it was not original Kriya Yoga.
There was a time when my Guruji (Satya Charan Lahiri) was alive, when a big Kriya organisation came and offered him a large amount of money because they wanted to make the family house their main office, and wanted him to be acting president, to give them credibility. He became very angry. They were using the name “Kriya” but the practice was completely changed.
Before Lahiri Mahasaya took Mahasamadhi, the disciples were asking him who would give them guidance after he had gone. And he answered, “I am nothing, I will go. But when you need help, even in the desert, you will get help.”
I see him every morning and evening (continued)
The idea of me going on a yoga path where I did not belong really needed some thinking, especially if I needed guidance. So I talked a lot with someone who was already Guruji’s disciple and told him my experience with the other (Kriya teacher). He explained some things to me and then I started thinking. I had to decide if I wanted to continue with yoga or Kriya meditation. And if I eventually would be able to give the things up that I was clinging on to so much at that moment. One week after my confusion with (the Kriya teacher) and having had time to take a step back and reflect on all the things I had learned with Guruji, I realised that he is my only Guru.
So I went back to Guruji a week later when classes were picked up again. Guruji also helped me through the confusion I had been through. The reason I returned and asked Guruji to be my spiritual teacher was that there was, and still is, an incredible trust while sitting for meditation. It is that peaceful state of mind where I can rest in during my meditation. At that time in India though we were not speaking much I was physically close to Guruji and we met almost every day.
Right now in my daily Western life every morning and evening while doing my Kriya practice I still sense that Guruji is watching. He is near to me and through him I can tune into that quiet peace of mind. Sometimes people ask me if I wished that Guruji would not be living so far away and if I would want to visit him more often. I answer them: “My life is here and I am close to my Guruji, I see him every morning and every evening.”